I discovered Specs years ago, when I offered to drive a group of friends to North Beach after a show at the I Beam (a very bad idea, it turned out). Unfortunately, one of my passengers, a 6’4 rock star-type, was sitting on the back seat battery of my 69 VW bug, which quickly ignited. I found myself pleading with my entourage to help me “put out the fire, dammit!!!”  Somewhere between Interstate 280 and the Embarcadero exit that no longer exists, my guests convinced me to pull over. They then proceeded to pee on the fire raging in the backseat of my car. I remember people going by at Broadway and Columbus, shaking their heads – as if this had never happened to them.

After the ordeal, we slid into a seat at Specs, although one of my passengers, whose ass was almost fried in a moment of bad luck, spent most of the evening, eyes glazed over, watching the cockroach races on the wall.

Right next to Tosca, across the street from Vesuvio, in small Saroyan Alley sits Specs, identified by a marquee consisting of eyeballs framed by, you guessed it, a pair of specs. The bar’s second name is the 12 Adler Museum and it was the premiere North Beach beatnik hangout before the action moved to Vesuvio. It was also the City’s first Union bar and one of the first lesbian bars.

Specs was founded by a well-traveled merchant marine who stocked the place full of knick- knacks from around the world. These have long provided talking points for patrons and the official name for the tavern. There are old nautical charts, scrim shaw (illustration on whale bone done by Eskimos), Polynesian tribal masks, art by North Beach punk icon Winston Smith, photos of Sophia Loren and a general salty ambience. Specs Simmons, the owner, can often be seen in his trademark black leather Beatles cap and black leather jacket.  At first glance, he looks like a gregarious hairless Santa – only, instead of kiddies, there’s usually a good-looking girl or two sitting in his lap. On the back wall of the bar there’s a newspaper article about him and his fishing buddies being rescued from the high seas, sometime in the early 60’s.

When I used to wander in here on Sundays, they had a nude drawing workshop that anyone could participate in. Specs has always been a big supporter of high art.  I remember that through the years there have also been woodcut classes, lectures, writing workshops, acting, poetry, art openings – you name it – these walls of dark wood and sea faring bric-a-brac have hosted just about everything you can think of, as well as the infamous “Wheel of Cheese.”

I was sad to learn that my favorite bartender, Sean, has finally retired.I will miss his familiar “Anooother pint, fer ya, then?” No matter. The Guinness still flows freely, and Specs still maintains its surliness and rough and ready feel, like the captains quarters of some long-ago pirate ship.

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